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Many people believe in horoscope predictions, signs, omens, superstitions. The practice of predictions is several thousand years old. What were the prophecies of the Delphic oracle, to which even the kings turned. Witches and prophets were able to "read" the fate of people in the palm of their hand, dreams, natural phenomena, events and omens. Today, for the most part, predictions for the future are perceived as comic, but they also make you think, change behavior and perception.

In the East, there is still a tradition of serving fortune cookies. Allegedly, a person can stretch his fate. Comic predictions, short and funny, can be great entertainment for a fun company. The person who prepared such “instructions” for the future for friends aims to cheer up, please the guests, and give a charge of positive emotions.

Comic predictions can be in verse and prose, have a direct meaning or carry an allegory. Of course, you should not take the predicted seriously, it's still cool, comic predictions. What can you wish for the future and how interesting to arrange? We offer several original examples.

Comic predictions for the future in verse

From payday to payday, life just keeps getting better!

Quit moping and upset

You need to smile more.

Who goes into the world with a smile,

Tom is lucky in all matters.

Wait another six months, you will find happiness in life!

There are only a couple of moments left before the summer, and there, as expected, a lot of fun!

Tomorrow, do not rush, but do not relax,

Get ready to work, but don't overwork yourself.

Save energy until the evening

To make the party fun.

Look around, you see - people are smiling.

These are true friends who rely on!

Go with your husband to the store - he received a salary!

Keep your nose to the wind and your tail to the gun.

Let the solution of the question "glass half empty or half full" be the only difficulty in your life!

So next week Every day will feel like Friday to you.

Don't have a hundred roubles, but have a hundred friends with a hundred roubles.

Learning is light, don't forget to take a flashlight.

Smile - it irritates everyone!

Tomorrow there will be a holiday on your street, do not miss the moment!

If life puts spokes in the wheels, it's time to take a walk.

Dreaming of a vacation? Dreams Come True!

Finally, you will receive the minister's salary. The main thing is that the minister should not be against it.

1. The classic option is shell cookies. Knead the most common lean dough (it will bake faster). Roll out the cake, cut the same circles. Place prepared predictions on small pieces of paper in the center of each circle of dough. Now blind "dumplings" by folding them in the shape of a shell. Place the cookies in the oven for a few minutes to bake the dough.
2. Place your wishes on long narrow strips of paper. Roll each into a roll. Attach candy to one end. Put it all in a candy bowl, mix.
3. Wishes themselves can be wrapped in the same sweets under the label.
4. Roll up rectangular sheets of colored paper (10x10 cm) with wishes into a tube. Tie each bundle with colored ribbon. For a beautiful presentation of wishes, find a beautiful vase.
5. Decorate cardboard cards 6x8 cm beautifully, in the center of each write what you want. Cover the surface with a thin layer of colorless nail polish (to make it glossy). As the varnish dries, paint over the area with the text with a white clerical proofreader. To read the wish, you need to erase the white layer with a coin. Instead of a corrector, you can take PVA glue by adding a little paint to the solution.
6. You can prepare miniature fabric bags and place notes with wishes in them. As well as decorated matchboxes, chocolate egg toy cases, plastic spinning balls, decorative perfume bottles with a cork. In general, there is no limit to the design fantasies.

Celebrating holidays with a big company is fun and interesting. But only if the entertainment program is planned. Without it, the celebration will turn into a banal eating of food and empty talk. If you take on the organization of the holiday, you need to think through everything carefully and prepare in advance. Decoration of the room, menu, music - all these are important components of the party. Most importantly, do not forget to prepare contests, games and quizzes. Guests will be completely delighted if you read them comic predictions. Short and funny, a little touching and romantic, positive and unusual words will give people a good mood.

crystal ball

Each of us wants to look into the future at least for a minute. Find out what awaits him and loved ones in the coming years. So give your friends this opportunity! Include in the script of the evening the visit of a famous witch. In her role, you can act on your own or involve one of the invitees. Set up a speech beforehand and the show can begin.

A few days before the celebration, prepare comic predictions. Short and funny, in verse they are best suited. Write them down on small sheets of paper, then roll them into a tube. You can age the paper with ordinary strong tea brewing or, conversely, paint the tubes in bright colors. Place these mysterious bundles in a regular balloon and inflate it. Tie one balloon to each guest's chair. They will not even suspect that there are comic and funny people behind their backs. In the middle of the evening, the witch appears!

The fun begins

The sorceress is dressed according to her image, in her hands is a crystal ball! She slowly enters the hall, giving everyone a mysterious look: “Hello, people! I came to you for a reason, the ball brought me! I see your future in it! Do you want to know the whole truth? Magic balls will appear behind your backs! Extract from them what is sent to you by higher powers!”

All come true

Guests can start popping balloons and taking out packages. Now the real fun begins! short and funny will amuse the audience and give a lot of positive emotions:

• soon you will meet love, you will marry again;
• as soon as you put on a red chignon, you will receive a million in a day;
• you will fly up the career ladder, you will quickly sit down with your boss;
• you will never go bald, your hair is kept by a lucky star;
• soon in your house you will hear a child's roar, laughter and trampling, and a pot, have fun soon, my friend;
• the miraculous balm will come across to you soon, you will be forever young, mischievous and groovy;
• Wake up in the morning - under the window of a foreign car, didn't you expect such a gift?

These are universal comic predictions. Short and funny, they are perfect for colleagues. This number will be relevant at the corporate party for any holiday!

Gypsy motifs

There is a strong stereotype that all gypsies are fortune tellers. So we will not dispel it, but, on the contrary, we will beat a fun situation. For the holiday, the gypsy Aza will come to you directly from the camp, which goes into the sky! He will look for five minutes and predict a bright future for everyone. it is very simple to make: you will need a colorful long skirt, a scarf on your head and more jewelry. Prepare in advance comic predictions, short and best suited. Write them down on sheets of paper and put them in a pretty box. The gypsy enters the room and explains that she found this chest by chance in her great-grandmother's house. She opened it and saw a note inside. She told that she should come to this house and distribute these sheets to those present.

Mysterious messages

The development of events can be different, let the guests take turns pulling out the package they like and enjoy what is written there! These should be comic predictions, short and funny, in verse or prose. A gypsy woman can call guests herself and tell them predictions in a mysterious voice!

• I can see very clearly, you have a huge family. You will all live together, your son will go to serve in the army.
• A trip to the mountains awaits you, you will make a splash there.
• A lot of money will fall on your head, and a friend will get rid of the disease.
• You will always have delicious food in the house.
• There will be a lot of joy, ice cream and sweets.
• Exactly in the night your happiness will come.
• Very, very soon, I see you at sea!

Everyone will definitely like these comic predictions, short and funny. For teenagers, youth and those over thirty, these are the best wishes!

All the best for children

If the house is planned children's holiday, be sure to prepare entertainment for the guys. Without them, the celebration will be boring and dull. Children will quickly get tired, overeat and want to go home. Hold several games, contests, let the smart ones show off their intellect in quizzes. After receiving small prizes, let the guys have a good rest and refreshment, and you can start the quest! After completing all the tasks and obstacles, present comic predictions, short and funny, as a prize. For children, this will be an unusual and interesting surprise! They will gladly open the cherished notes and read the messages!

• very soon you will have new friends;
• in the shopping center you will buy just cool pants;
• when you hear a loud ringing, you get a new phone;
• you will get five fives, although you teach very poorly;
• they call, you open the door, and there is a brand new briefcase;
• soon everything will be cool, you will have a red dachshund;
• a neighbor will fall in love with you, and you will live a hundred years;
• in the coming month of October, luck itself will come to you;

Such comic predictions, short and funny, will be a pleasant surprise for children.

School years

Not everyone likes to go to school, but, having matured, they remember these years and dream of returning to the past! Try to arrange parties, discos, competitions and games for the guys for every holiday. So the class will become more friendly, united. At any of the events, you can give children an unusual surprise - comic predictions, short and funny. For schoolchildren, select the special phrases they need. Let them be with humor, but also with a hidden meaning.

• Something good will happen and you will want to change! You will study only for five and attend all sections.
• This year you will find yourself, you will start writing books and poems.
• Learn a foreign language, because you are a natural diplomat.
• They will send you to the running competitions, you show yourself there properly.
• You need to start dancing, and pump your back muscles, your parents are very happy, you will become a pop star.
• You will sing like a nightingale, do not be too shy on stage!

The guys will be delighted and will remember these predictions for a long time. And if you believe in good, then it will definitely come true!

Funny and short predictions are almost always a win-win option; with their help, you can entertain adults at a New Year's party, some kind of banquet or anniversary. No worse than comic predictions come in at children's parties, whether it's a birthday, a New Year's party, or any other celebration.

The main thing here is that the predictions are positive, with a high sense of humor, and do not offend the guests. Notes can be placed in cookie or in gilded walnut shells or in small boxes. You can also organize a whole performance gypsy fortune-tellers with cards or divination by hand, the exit of a "psychic" or "astrologer". Also very fashionable recent times at fairs, when a monkey or a parrot pulls out notes with predictions.

Comic predictions for children

To arrange a very good and pleasant holiday for the children, which they would definitely remember for a long time, add a little magic to it. To do this, write short comic predictions on small pieces of paper, then fold the pieces of paper and mix them in a hat, and let each child pull out one such prediction at random. The text might look something like this:

1) He who drinks a lot of milk grows very quickly!

2) He who does not eat porridge grows frail, is reputed to be a weak guy!

3) Soon your neighbor will fall in love with you, you will live together with him for three hundred years!

4) Very soon you will hear a strong ringing, your new phone will ring!

5) You will soon get fives, stop noticing it, help mom and dad, you won’t offend the weak!

6) At dawn you will wake up, smile innocently at the mirror. And from there, such a hello to you, the white, bearded grandfather will smile!

7) Today will be a happy and cheerful day, so don’t hang your nose on the floor. I promise, and then your lucky star will shine in the sky!

8) Mom will quietly come up, gently take your hand, kiss you, and then you will be happy forever!

9) Whoever loves to sleep too long, there will be no surprises in life, you will oversleep them all, blame yourself for that!

10) There will be a feast for you soon, my friend, you will soon cook a mouthful, a lot of delicious sweets are waiting for you and hello from dad and mom!

11) A wonderful country, here even pastries talk!

12) Take a cool photo with me, I love taking pictures!

Comic predictions for adults

Adults, sometimes like children, they also need entertainment in order to escape from the hard and boring workdays. For this, comic fortune-telling for a birthday, banquet, anniversary or New Year. And unlike children's predictions, if the atmosphere allows, then comic predictions for the new year for adults can be diluted with a little "peppercorn".

1. As soon as all the honest people get drunk, there is no need to "drive the horses forward." Maybe today sex is waiting for you, but tomorrow a pay slip can wait!

2. Today, vodka will flow like a river, since the whole team gets drunk. Prizes will lose, was it worth it to get drunk!

3. So that colleagues do not start rolling their carts at you. No need to tease them dashingly, but it would be better to sit quietly.

4. The happiest predictions, for those who are not afraid of reproach. And if the director kicks him out of work, have fun, soul, let there be less worries!

5. As many peas in your favorite salad, so many happy days await. But do not rush to eat all of them, otherwise hurry to the bathroom together!

6. And your dreams will come true as soon as you are with the boss "on you." Take the Napoleon cake, sit down and bow to it!

7. Don't drink too much today, and don't try to fall in love with anyone. After all, everyone knows that you can’t copulate at work!

8. Desires will come true for everyone, and great success awaits you all. But it is important not to miss it, to have time for your own, to snatch it with your teeth!

9. The heavens prophesy the stars for you, great, unrestrained debauchery. That is why it is not too late to buy a rubber "outfit"!

10. If you drink a can of beer every day, then you can live happily all year!

11. In the first days of January, an old dream will come true. You should be prepared for this, and now pour a glass, drink and calm down!

12. Here you need to try a little bit, and you don’t need to be ashamed of anyone at all. Here's a little more luck, there will be an addition to your house!

1. If you take the initiative, success will not be long in coming.
2. Important news will come very soon.
3. The answer to your question is related to some man, perhaps well known to you.
4. Something new will come into your life that will significantly affect your personality.
5. You hope not in vain!
6. The result of your actions may be unexpected.
7. You are on the right track! Do not stop!
8. You will finally be able to unlock the rusty lock.
9. The results of the case that you have in mind may disappoint, or they may surprise you greatly.
10. The problem is not where you think.
11. Forward and only forward: the cause you are thinking about is right!
12. Your goal is achievable!
13. Success will come if you don't listen to anyone's advice.
14. A time of doubt and hesitation has come for you. But don't worry - everything will work out!
15. Time must pass from the sowing of grain to the harvest.
16. Lead an ordinary life, but in an unusual way.
17. Remember that true partnership can only exist between whole individuals.
18. Be attentive to the clues of fate.
19. Winning comes from what you have to give up.
20. Act according not to old authorities, but to what you think is right for you.
21. It's time to finish the old and start the new.
22. Do not expect too much and do not think about the end result.
23. Finish first what you started.
24. Be patient, and if your decision is correct, the Universe will support it.
25. Don't get emotional.
26. Look after your health.
27. Enjoy your luck and share it with people around you.
28. Focus on the present.
29. Don't expect quick results.
30. Go with the flow of life without judgments and attempts to understand it.
31. Trust what happens to you.
32. Think and take your time with actions.
33. It's time to act, even if you are required to jump into the void.
34. Do not try to stubbornly show your WILL.
35. Unexpected news awaits you.
36. Look in the mirror and you will see a charming face.
37. Tomorrow you will brush your teeth, and then thoughts.
38. Your wish will come true this week.
39. On Thursday, be careful - an interesting event awaits you.
40. Everything will be fine! Just believe!
41. A new acquaintance awaits you.
42. Expect a surprise. Very soon!
43. All your wishes will surely come true.
44. You will soon find the lost thing!
45. You will be very surprised at something!
46. ​​You will do a useful thing!
47. If you want to be successful, you must look like you have it.
48. The best is the enemy of the good. Don't overdo it!
49. The most stupid desire is to please everyone.
50. What we pray for is what we receive.
51. The winner differs from the vanquished only in that he rises one more time than he falls.
52. In life there is the main thing and not the main thing, but we often waste our energy on trifles.
53. Not as good as I wanted, but not as bad as it could be!
54. Do what you must, and come what may.
55. The other side of the crisis is new opportunities.
56. When God closes a door, he opens a window for you.
57. A journey of a thousand miles begins with the first step.
58. Never be afraid to do what you can't. Remember, the ark was built by an amateur. Professionals built the Titanic!
59. It's better to regret what you did, and not about what you didn't do.
60. Whoever stands still, he goes back.
61. What is not done is for the better.
62. No one is defeated until he admits he is defeated.
63. The struggle is always justified if you know what you are striving for.
64. Do not rush into heroes until they call.
65. These people and these events of your life ended up here because you yourself brought them here. What happens to them next is up to you.
66. Never ask anyone for anything, especially from those who are stronger than you - they themselves will come and give everything.
67. Only fools get lucky once. Smart people are always lucky.
68. Evil is not in what enters a person's mouth, but in what comes out of them.
69. Do what you can, using what is, where you are now.
70. If you don’t believe in yourself, then you won’t start anything. And if nothing starts, then nothing will happen.
71. Today, the tomorrow that you worried about yesterday has just come.
72. There are no hopeless situations: even if you were eaten, you have at least two options.

Fortune-telling games are an interesting and very cheerful element of the holiday, which invariably evokes a response from guests. Serious prophecies and real fortune-telling at parties are inappropriate, because a negative forecast can completely spoil the mood. But comic divination always goes with a bang.

There are many ways to play this game. You can, for example, make a deck of fake cards: on the one hand - a shirt, and on the other - a printed prediction. Someone dresses up as a gypsy and invites guests to draw one card at a time and read the prophecy aloud.

Other options:

• make fortune cookies;
• print funny candy wrappers with predictions inside, wrap sweets in them, give them to guests and offer to unwrap them;
• write prophecies on small cards with congratulations, put them in a box and invite guests to pull out one at a time;
• stick stickers with numbers on the bottom of plates or glasses. Put this dish on a separate tray. Let the guests take it apart before the feast. As a result, everyone will get a randomly drawn number. When the moment is right, the host will ask the guests to look at the stickers. The participants of the holiday will call the numbers that have fallen to them, and the presenter will read out the numbered predictions.

Comic predictions for films and songs

Movie titles

This is a simple, but original and very interesting way to predict the fate of the next year. The prophecy is directly the name of the film or cartoon. Not a plot, but only a phrase. Let the guests excel in interpretations.

For example: "Next year I'm expecting ... a game of thrones." This can be interpreted in any way - for example, as a struggle for a position or as a dispute over the role of the head of the family.

Appropriate movie titles

Foreign films

• Armageddon
• big jackpot
• The scent of a woman
• chicken coop escape
• Taming of the Shrew
• groundhog day
• Monsters, Inc
• Deal with the devil
• Midnight in Paris
• A Nightmare on Elm Street
• Sky over Berlin
• money train
• Sex in the city
• Key to all doors
• Third wheel
• Getting to know the parents
• fatal attraction
• best friend wedding
• obscene proposal
• Forty year old virgin
• 12 angry men
• haunted mansion
• The Wedding Planner
• Friends with Benefits
• Blonde in law
• Breaking Bad

Soviet and Russian films

• Love affair at work
• Love and pigeons
• good luck zigzag
• 8 first dates
• Long road in the dunes
• Girl with no address
• love-carrot
• White sun of desert
• Big change

Lines from songs

Entertainment similar to the previous one. Only this time, the prophecy is a line from a famous song. Phrases can be printed on paper (indicating the artist in brackets). But if not laziness, it is better to prepare audio cuts. In this case, fortune-telling will turn out to be much more spectacular and interesting.

Fragments of songs are numbered. The guests draw numbers, according to which short musical predictions are voiced to them. So, what has fate prepared for your guests in the coming year?

Suitable song lines:

1. Only a glass of vodka on the table (G. Leps)
2. Million, million, million scarlet roses (A. Pugacheva)
3. Money, money, money. Always sunny in the rich man's world (ABBA)
4. And the sea has white sand, a warm wind blows in the face (J. Friske)
5. Oh, this wedding, wedding, wedding sang and danced
6. There is nothing better in the world than friends wandering around the wide world ... (m / f "The Bremen Town Musicians")
7. Oh, mother, chic ladies, chic ladies (F. Kirkorov)
8. I am free, like a bird in the sky (V. Kipelov)
9. You are lucky - you are not like everyone else! You work in an office! ("Leningrad")
10. Voyage, voyage. There, where I have never been (S. Minaev)
11. I love boogie-woogie, I boogie-woogie every day ("Secret")
12. Dad bought a car. Dad bought a car. Dad bought a car. (A. Pugacheva)
13. Everything will be awesome, everything will certainly be awesome. There are big changes ahead. I know this for sure: everything will be awesome (P. Volya)
14. Oh, I feel, girls, go on a spree. Oh, I'll take a walk (Verka Serduchka)
15. The plane easily takes me away (Valeria)
16. Everything is in a bunch, but we have everything in a bunch. Where we can’t climb straight, we’ll go sideways (Potap and Nastya)
17. I am lying in the sun. I look at the sun. I lie and lie and look at the sun (m / f “How the Lion and the Turtle sang a song”)
18. Freedom, freedom, give me freedom! I'll fly up like a bird! (m / f "Flying ship")
19. The trailer will move, the trailer will move, the trailer will move ... The trailer will move, the platform will remain (film "The Irony of Fate, or Enjoy Your Bath")
20. If there was a sea of ​​​​beer, I would become a beautiful dolphin. If there was a sea of ​​vodka, I would become a submarine ("Dune")

From bad habit in the new year
You will definitely get rid.
But here's the problem: instead of one
Two new ones will come to replace

You will spend your vacation at sea
You will warm your body and soul.
You will spend the whole amount, you will burn yourself five times,
You will gain six kilograms.

Smile always, smile everywhere
Smile on land and on water!
Fate will repay you for smiles
A couple of wrinkles and a bunch of dough!

Either you eat, or you pump up,
Whether you sit in a chair -
Know that next year
You will significantly increase your ass.

If you start kissing
Every day for half an hour
All dreams will come true.
Life will be filled with miracles!

At higher power for you
Disappointing forecast:
New Year promises you
Love roofer!

If you can, without being lazy,
Plow like a horse on Thursdays
Fate will open the way for you
For big, big money.

If you go across the field -
You will find money in the field;
When you find money
You will spend it all on a spree

Go around for three miles
Hairdresser-talker:
Shreds, anyhow,
And cut off your ear!

We must forget for a year
About cognac, tequila, vodka.
Otherwise, you will
in crime reports.

The cockroaches in your head will have a very fun year.

Your friends will not forget you next year. Don't forget the one who owes you money.

AT next year all your problems will go away. Because even they are bored with you...

Your life next year will be multifaceted, like a glass. Well, you understand…

Your dreams will gain strength and declare war on your couch.

Next year you will understand that your inner core is an awl in the ass.

In the coming year, your body will decide for itself when to sleep, where to sleep and with whom to sleep. Don't contradict him - he knows best!

You will spend your vacation where everything is inclusive - with relatives.

If you get bored - sing romances. Your finances will always keep you company.

The bad news is you'll put on weight. The good news is that the increase will occur in the wallet area.